“You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.” As much as do not wish to quote a sensationalized figure, who is an embodiment of the erroneous “hard work” model like Steve Jobs, this quote has always resonated with me. Pain can force an individual out of a set mold, just as an insect or a crustacean departs its exoskeleton, life has strange ways to enforce enlightenment upon you. Wise, citing a quarrel (centered around race) with his mom states, “And for that experience I thank her, because without it, I may never have really seen how distorted white people could be as a result of racism” (91). Similarly, I honestly doubt I would be the aware self I am today if I did not see and hear the blatantly racist remarks my parents took part in. At least in my experience, I have found that for some peculiar reason, hurtful words of loved ones have the ability to puncture the depths of your heart and make it cry in ways a stranger never could. I was jaded, saddened, and frustrated with the consistent generalizations, which would spew out of my own mother and father’s lips. These generalizations would more often than not turn in to heavily negative stereotypes, which then would be applied to other members of the same race (it is worth mentioning this incident never occurred with anyone belonging to the white race). They have not (at least not yet) realized “what it means to be white: the murderous actions of one person do not cause every other white person to be viewed in the same light” (186). When do generalizations move into problematic stereotypes? Stereotypes are over-generalizations and they often involve assuming a person has certain characteristics based on unfounded assumptions. These stereotypes can easily lead to prejudice and result in some forms of discrimination. While generalizing helps us navigate our lives, stereotyping puts us in a dangerous place in which societal members are limited from their true potential and face barriers to contributing their talents and assets to the societal mix. I would like to believe this distinction is the precise differentiating factor between my parents and I. I can easily point out the instances where my parents’ words and at times actions towards blacks have hurt me tremendously because they could not embrace nor accept the shared humanity we all share. However, I can only connect the dots of my life looking backwards. As counter-intuitive it may seem, I would like to thank my parents and my extended family for every overtly racist comment ever uttered, for every instance where they felt it was perfectly acceptable for them to belittle the “inferiors” and place themselves up in a pedestal built upon a false sense of superiority. Thank you for every emotionally and psychologically draining and exasperating occurrence centered on race – there is no, nor will there ever be a replacement for those invaluable illuminations.